Cinta Sejati

I've came across this song few days ago and damn the lyrics and the melody really melts me on the spot. in fact the movie itself made me shed tears while watching it. such a great movie and song. hats off!

xoxo
=)

p/s: BCL never fails to make me love her songs.

insanity strikes. mayday mayday!

Oh My Freakin Handphone! man, I've lost my baby at Taiping on my last day being there and now I'm phoneless. shitzzz. it's been two days without my baby and trust me when I say, I MISS MY BABY. it may not be as expensive as these days phones but buying it with my very own money and it cost me RM1000+ when I bought it using my own salary, after 3 months working at Hush Puppies before. 

so, I need a replacement.haisyo. which mama clearly mentions that she doesn't want to waste her money for. *sigh* . so I have to either save up real big fortune through out this semester, to work my ass off during the next semester holiday or just wait if ANYONE is kind enough to buy me one. *cross fingers*

it's between this 5 hard selections. amaigatzzzz!

anyone? please? T____T

xoxo

=)

p/s: sampai batuk + demam fikir pasal ni. hampehzzzz

preparation

well hello there. again I do think that I do best in writing, so this is why I'm back. dearie lappy was not in a good condition for the pass one month and so makes me a little crazeeeeh since I have so much to write up for my 2 months holidays. but when it's back to business, well, penyakit M saya pun mula lah membiak kembali dalam setiap urat dalam badan ni sampai hilang terus feel nak bebel pape. lame. I know. blerggh

so, today it's the 30th of May. and wow, how time flies!! which means we are getting closer to Ramadhan and Syawal. gahh. one thing for sure, both of this sacred months will never be the same again. there wouldn't be atok's rendang ayam for hari mantai (which is the Ramadhan and Syawal's eve. the Negeri Sembilan's people named it as hari mantai) and ummi's kuah kacang (nuts gravy) for hari raya. maigadd! been 19 years that I had those dishes for my raya treats and all of the sudden, I wouldn't get to eat it anymore after this.

now and then, I tend to get jealous whenever I see my friends updating about their grandparents. kinda of envy too. tried not to be such a baby about that, but losing ummi and atok in such a time is not a good thing for me. it's kinda unfair to lose them both when I haven't achieved anything to make them proud of me. mama for example, her grandmother whom I addressed as nyang lived till she was 90 years old while mama was 49. 49! mama got to give her grandmother to see her with 3 kids. and me? sigh.

but whatever it is, I know ALLAH SWT has better plans for both atok and ummi and all that I can do is that to always pray for them. ~Al-Fatihah~

and so. speaking about raya, well this year we've decided to pick Mint Green as our theme color. main reason why we chose this color because Aunty N is getting married in September and it's her theme color. so to actually save up some cost because we are going somewhere for a short trip in middle of september, mama asked to just make that color as our theme color too. whatever you said, mam...

courtesy of google

so this is the color that I should be looking for. and this year jugak iolls nak try beli baju dah siap. oh no. I am not talking about custom made kurungs but those which are sold at boutiques. takpelah mahal sikit as long iolls tak payah nak memeningkan kepala nak fikir nak jahit kat mana because my tailor yang sekarang ni dah macam tak reti nak menjahit langsung. eee...bengkak pulak hati kita ni tau!

I've tried checking out online boutiques but oh maiii. can't they be more expensive? RM550 for a thai silk kurung which I can get it at Jalan TAR for just...what? RM35?pfft. baru ingat nak grab the ones Jovian Mandagie and Rizalman selling now at Zalora. but still of course there wouldn't be my choice of color. this is the hardest part when it comes on buying ready made kurungs *double sigh*

so I guess I just have to go to the hot spots like Shah Alam or Jalan TAR to get the kurung. gahhhh! killing me to actually walk from one shop to another.haisyo. means that I have to block two days which means my weekend to go around. pray for me please? thank you!

xoxo
=)

p/s: juling mata iolls tengok color yang menariks. thinking to pick the colors now for my 5 years plan. *pukes*

dream wardrobe

literally every normal girl would dream of having their very own wardrobe. and guess what? I am not excluded from the list! *lame, I know. just bear with it*

I've never thought that I would be saying this, but I might be getting a husband *coughs* that can provide me the wardrobe of my dream. maybe when he was about to become my husband or better still, le boyfriend, I'll just shoot him with..."hey! so do you think you can get me my very own wardrobe when we get married later?" LOL. if he says yes, oh wow! what a guy I'm getting married to! he must have really loves me, don't you think so?

as a husband, it is their duty to make their wife to be happy sooooo, if he plans to make me happy and so that he don't have to spend his nights outside of our room, I recommendly advising whoever he is to take note of what I want for my wardrobe. *coughs again*

wardrobe checklist:

• separate wardrobe for us both. err...I know that we are husband and wife but are you sure you wanna share it with me? because I can feel that you would also have your very own clothes or shoes and God knows how many could it be! and to chuck it all in one place just wouldn't be a good idea.
• big mirror. a very big one. 
• the wardrobe is going to be in our room. when I say our room, it means in our freakin room. not somewhere outside. and yeah, I don't mind if we have small space for us as long as I get to have my wardrobe in our room.

think you are bold enough to fulfill this checklist? then just sign up and you'll get the chance to date me!

till then maybe you, my future husband can just get hints on how MY wardrobe should be with the help of these pictures. enjoy browsing!

courtesy of google

xoxo

=)

p/s: I swear to God if someone actually takes this seriously, I would buy him just whatever he wants. *pinky promise*

back to school

lol. how I wish that for real I am going back to school. but obviously school is not where I'm heading to in 2 weeks time. sad me. *crying a river*

2 weeks left for the new semester. and hello peeps, I am a fourth semester student of UiTM, the Mass Comm Faculty of course!

so for this semester, yes. gonna be an NR again. more experience to be gained. new people to mix with and new environment to go through Ramadhan. been waiting for this semester too actually. will be having interesting subjects and man! I can't wait for our photo subject. *ish. eager much*

so just wish me luck guys and yes. I do need all strength to go through this semester.

xoxo
=)

p/s: lets just see who'll be my new circle of friends for this semester, shall we? *winks*

From teen to -ty

it's less than 2 hours now for 9th april to show up. while waiting, I'm thinking of just, you know. having some quality time here reminiscing old days.

life is pretty much kinda surprising I guess. it was last year that I've thrown my 19th birthday party along with ummi and atok's birthdays as well at our home. well, it was how we normally celebrate it each year. buat makan makan and cake cutting ceremony. and it's pretty obvious this year there's no big gaga celebrations to be done. it's sad to actually celebrate this year's birthday because of the lost, but I'm pretty sure that ummi and atok wouldn't want our birthdays to not be celebrated as how we previously did.

and so, nothing new this year. and not gonna celebrate besar-besaran pun as I'm still stuck in Melaka. waiting for my finals to end. oh yes, having my finals now. my third semester's finals which will be ended this upcoming thursday. I've sat for 4 papers already and so far, (forgive me if the words used are rude) CIT is very much a pain in my ass! literally, that's the only paper that makes me wanna curse and use all the foul words that ever existed in this world! MAN! scary weh bila buat paper tuh. sangat macam nyawa di hujung tanduk sebenarnya sebab no matter how much I did revise it but still...hmmph!

so yeah, back to birthday. my last year as teen and welcome -ty years ahead! have to stick this fact in my head starting from now on. more to expect, shouldn't I? maybe something that would change my life or some other's life this upcoming years, and we would never know kannn?

xoxo
=)

p/s: still holds the very wish that I had since 2008. and 5 years more to materialized it.

early marriage

oh yes people of the radar. as I've promised previously I would share my opinions on this particular topic but before that, I would like you guys to bear with me for few seconds.

remember this? this was what I felt in my previous entry. and do you guys know that after 4 days I blogged it, my dearly grandfather has passed away, living the rest of us to move on with our lives. yeap. on the 17th of January 2013, we've lost my atok, Mohammad Razalli Bin Abd Hamid due to; nothing. -__-. atok took his last breath without any sickness neither any illness, just like ummi before. which makes us a bit hard to accept this fate that ALLAH SWT has written for us. even though a couple of weeks has passed but we still feel the loss. the pain. the presence of both ummi and atok. it's been only 104 days after ummi left us and atok decided to be with her. well, I guess maybe he misses his 50 years companion, literally TOO MUCH. with us being around him doesn't help much in healing his condition being left by ummi.

for atok, don't worry. as much I love ummi, that is how much I do love you. both of you have special places in my heart. kakak will always miss and love you both till the end of my life. ~al-fatihah~

now back to our topic. oh yess people. naah. maybe this early marriage thing is kinda hard to dig about but come on. I wanna tell you guys what do I think about this matter. so, shall we?

in my class, there are two of my classmates got married at the age of 19. well, they are married at the age of 19 and what the hell was I doing when I were 19? -.-' . I've never had the chance to talk personally to them and ask them why they've got married so fast but I guess maybe they have solid reasons on doing so.

as for me, I have nothing against early marriage to be telling the truth. maybe for certain people, ALLAH has decided that's the best for their lives. but trust me when I say, getting married at teen-age is just so not me. why? good question!

first thing first. I'm still young weh! hidup sendiri pun mak bapak yang still handle kan, ada hati nak handle hidup seorang lagi manusia.heh. kalau manusia yang sorang tu perangai sebaik baik alam, takpelah jugak. almaklum laa, lelaki ni payah sikit lah nak expect outcome dia. ingat senang ke nak urus hidup anak teruna orang hah?

secondly, nak kahwin awal awal ni, dah puas hati ke enjoy? dah puas buat benda benda tak senonoh? for me la kan, nikah ni is like an ibadah. once your husband accepted those Ijab by replying the Qabul, it's a big responsibility waiting for you ahead. dah tak boleh buat sesuka hati dah. that is why I say, selagi masih diberi peluang nak berjimba, selagi masih lagi bebas tanpa sebarang ikatan (chewaahhh!) , gunakanlah sebaik mungkin. I'm not saying that it's compulsory for us to have fun, but come on. 17 years of schooling and obviously we will be living with our parents during that time. graduating from school, kita mesti dapat offer furthering studies kat Uni pulak kan? masa ni laa kita dapat free sikit from parents kita, kan? why not enjoy the time of being young, wild and free? and I'm absolute disagreeing on the concept, "kalau dah kahwin, automatic rasa nak buat benda benda tak senonoh tu semua mesti dah hilang". heh. itu semua bullshit! and why is that so? sebab nafsu dah mula kuasa diri and the only thing that occur on your mind is SEX?

thirdly, getting married as early as 18 maybe? then how old is your husband? 25? 27? 30? 32? if it is, then it's okay laa. tapi kalau laki hangpa tuh jenis yang tua 2, 3 tahun je dari hangpa, tolonglah pikiaq balik masak masak chek oii! bukan apa. kalau yang dah banyak tahun tuh, at least (bukan semua) depa ni dah ada lah yang steady income nya, ye dak? yang umur selingkungan ni, nak suap anak dara orang makan apa oii kalau makan pakai sendiri pun mak bapak yang sponsor? what? ada PTPTN? MARA?heh. sedangkan untuk korang punya sendiri pun tak lepas, inikan pulak nak support dua orang punya hidup. ada sebab kenapa PT dgn MARA tu bagi pinjam cukup cukup satu semester sebenarnya.

fourth, kahwin awal sebab nak elak terlibat dengan maksiat? why ehh? sebab sememangnya chuolls punya nafsu tinggi melangit ke? sampai takut terlanjur apa bagai. haiyo! grow up sikit boleh tak? semua orang ada akal kan? USE IT! begitu rendah ke tahap keimanan kau sampai sanggup nak terlanjur? mesti takkan? so what's with the reason? it's pathetic!

and so, this is what I think about this so-called-early-marriage-thingy. well, maybe some of you might oppose my thoughts, but hey! we are Malaysian okay? and we practices democracy in this country and it's up to you on either to support or oppose. it's never a problem to me, seriously. it's not that I would go chasing after you with a stick of broom if you do disagree.heh

my advice is (advice? me talking?) to THINK very carefully about this matter. this is also to be think by the parents as well. you wouldn't want to jeorpadize your children's future, aren't you, parents? as for teenagers, practically in this modern days, I do think that marriage should wait till we gained our success. wouldn't it be nice to graduate from degree singlely and to work out our asses to make fortune for ourselves? to repay our parents hardships in raising us up? and after completing all those, to be married to this one person, the love of your life with you already achieved a great deal of life enjoyment? wouldn't that be nice?

me?hahahaa. nahh. I already have my target. I do want to get married after I'm 24. which I think it's a suitable age for girls to end their singlelism. and of course after collecting the amount of fortune that I've always wanted, after getting myself a car, a house, travelled to the places that I wanna go on my own with my grilfriends and cousins and family then only I will settle down. what? too many hopes and dreams? nahh. it's never a sin to dream high but it would be crashing much if the dreams couldn't be fulfilled. bear that!

xoxo
=)

p/s: 5 years left to fulfilled the dreams. PHEWWWW!